It is like there is this switch inside of me that makes me all in or all out. Completely overworked and committed or not present and interested.
I've been thinking about all of these things lately, and I am in a dark and terrible place right now. The only thing that I like right now is exercising. I do like the kitties, but they are not bringing me joy or peace right now because I feel so sad that I can't give them the love they need and want. It's one thing to talk about it, but I'm still stuck feeling like no one understands. And I am angry. Angry beyond belief at everyone and everything, and all of that is boiling over and very negatively affecting me and my behavior at work.
I don't know what else to say about it. I'm tired and I need to go to sleep now. Sigh.
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